Posts Tagged ‘psychology’

Hypocrites In Church

Posted: October 12, 2024 in Uncategorized
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Now, I bet from the title many of you have different thoughts about what this particular post will be about.

Let’s get back to the beginning, my Mom & Dad raised me up in church; I mean we never missed a Sunday morning at least as far as I can remember. My Dad ended up out of my life for a long time and Mom continued to be a strong influence in my life and keep me active in church as well as many other activities including Bible studies and things at home and with friends and even my Boy Scout Troop. Needless to say, I was active and, in the Bible, even though I don’t know that I always understood everything as well as maybe I should’ve.

My Dad finally came back into my life when I was nearly 40… He was coming to stay with me for a week to catch up and visit. At this point in my life, I was extremely active in my church as I had been a part of a church plant in Austin and always participated as much as absolutely possible. It was something so important to me and even at that time, didn’t realize how integral to my life it was going to become… At that time, I felt I was so very involved… a few years later, I realize that I truly wasn’t as involved as I could have been or as I should have been… We’ll get into that in another post…

I told my Dad that we would be attending church on Sunday morning and asked him if that was okay. He responded as any good supportive Dad would, I suppose, “I am happy to go with you, but not sure I have anything fancy to wear.”

I told him he didn’t have to dress any particular way; it didn’t really matter…Just come as you are! So, he went to church with us and saw a different kind of church… I was raised in Southern Baptist, and this was different… We sang, danced, and really worshipped the Lord!! It was something he didn’t really realize what experience he was really in for.
Later, as we sat on the back porch, I asked him, “so, Dad, why do you no longer go to church because I remember going to church every Sunday morning?”
He simply responded to me, “In my life I’ve seen a lot and there are just too many hypocrites in church.”

This is an interesting perspective which got me thinking. He still believes in God but doesn’t want to go to church as there are far too many hypocrites there. The truth is that he wasn’t wrong. I started thinking about the idea of a gym and how a lot of the time, you envision a gym filled with buff, ripped, really fit individuals and occasionally see an extremely out of shape, overweight person in the gym and people say, “wow, that’s brave,” that he or she would be in the gym in that shape… How else do you get into shape and get fit if not in the gym?? Seriously people… How does it work? Are we expected to get into shape in private behind a closed door and only go out into public once we look great … I mean, this is the equivalent of what we expect from Christians… “Get ‘right’ with Jesus and stop messing up and then and only then may you enter the house of God.

Now the truth of the matter is that recently I heard an excellent sermon in which Pastor referenced the “names” Christians are called stating that “hypocrites” is actually the most often true. He expressed the reason behind this was that Christians often won’t admit they are not “okay.” Many of us are not okay at one point or another yet far too often won’t admit it. I found his perspective interesting also as it ties into thoughts I’ve had for many years and worked in my own way to articulate… I’ve been called out as “being hard on Christians” but I think the problem tends to be in that so many Christians take opportunities to find fault in others rather than seeing their own faults and flaws.

An interesting side note… two great psychologists world renowned for their innovation and intelligence exchanged letters back and forth over a span of about 8 years. these two men exchanged what began as respectful and friendly professional discussion on how they could better their care at their and offer the best possible help for their patients would only to serve as their biggest conflict. The one man began explaining to the other how they needed to take time to really analyze their own deep-rooted issues and through self-awareness they’d be able to see their patience through different light. the second man expressed how they needed to have no issues in order to be the best possible doctors and scientists. The first followed up by stating how no one is absent issues; it’s only a matter of whether or not you are aware of them. As I mentioned, this became their greatest conflict, and their friendship fizzled out and they were not able to overcome this disagreement. The first man was Dr. Sigmund Freud while the second was Dr. Carl Jung and they founded the International Psychoanalytical Organization Foundation right in the midst of their letters and shortly after, they parted ways due to this disagreement.

I find this interesting as it speaks to a secular perspective while I’m focusing on my faith… both are the same though because we are all human beings.

We all deal with issues, and we all go through times of refusing to be honest with even ourselves…sometimes mostly ourselves. It is only through honesty and self-awareness that we can truly grow and become better. This is important to understand if you really want growth…as a person and through your spiritual walk.

Back to where we started, the things is that yes, there are hypocrites in church. There are sinners in church. I’m glad they are in church and pray that God speaks to them and reaches them. Church is definitely the place for them to be so they can surround themselves with others who will help them learn and grow and get more connected with God.

Now, if you are spiritually “out of shape” the church is a perfect place to start. But that is also another key aspect of this… It is the place to start… It is not the end. Your journey is far from over. You’ve got to continue to seek God and chase after more. The more you seek a relationship with Jesus, the easier it will become to live the life He has designed for you.

Hypocrites in church…??… Of course, hopefully it si the first step on a long journey. Let’s go!!!

Blaze a Trail

Posted: February 12, 2019 in Bayless Enterprises
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In light of the recent controversy surrounding last night’s Grammy’s, I find this to be a perfect topic. There has been drama surrounding the Grammy’s for as long as I can remember. A good majority of the time, it is something silly… at least that is my opinion… considering that people will argue these things endlessly at nauseum, I suppose it isn’t silly to them… All of this is perpetuated by social media… I digress…

In my opinion one of the most relevant moments in Grammy history was in 1989 when Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff were nominated and ultimately won Best Rap Performance for “Parents Just Don’t Understand”. They chose to stay home and not attend, boycotting the event because the hip hop portion of the award show would not be aired on tv. When questioned, with Jeff backing him up, Will simply said that they intended to sit at home so one day, others wouldn’t have to. They took a stand because they felt in unfair that their genre of music wasn’t being respected. This was a key moment when Jazz and Will took a stand and said they were not only proud of who they were but were willing to walk away from accolades in which they felt they were not being given proper respect.

I would like to enlighten you to the fact that there isn’t much new to launch… Everything has been done… maybe I’m wrong, but when was the last time you saw something new? It is just new versions and dressed up a new way or presented in a new manner…

This is both a disadvantage and an advantage… What can you offer that isn’t already out there? What can you do that no one else can? Well, the answer is simple… Give them you… Just you. Whatever business it is you are marketing or what skill you are promoting… Give yourself in it. Give it your twist. Everything I do, believe me… It has all been done. There are plenty of people who can sell products, plenty who advertise or market ideas, plenty who coach people in their lives as well as business…. Everything I do, people have done before me… But what I do, is I give them me, Corey B. There ain’t no other good ol fashion, God Lovin’, hip hop thumpin’ Irish Texan that does things quite the way I do… that speaks in quite the manner I do. I have a special way that I speak…I have a way I talk… I have a background in psychology as well as statistics and experimental design which gives me a special perspective that many business minded people do not have. I’m Corey B. I’m loud and proud, I ‘Get Cocky’ on the regular…. Matter of fact I’m pretty cocky presently… Are you feelin’ it?

There are so many ideas out there and it is easy to sit back and think, “Oh I could do that” or “they should be doing that better”…. There is only one of you… The particular combination of your skill set along with your personality, your background, the who and what that makes you, you. Embrace who you are and give all of you in what you are doing and that is how you make your mark and set yourself apart from the others. If you are on the few who can do something completely new, that is freakin’ awesome… but if you can just give yourself permission to be you and make your mark, you are light years ahead of the masses and there you have it… you have a legacy… and that is how you build your business and build your brand.

I hope you have gotten a little more insight in to who Corey B actually is… if you are still not clear, stay tuned my friends… and Get Cocky

Don’t Hide

Posted: February 10, 2019 in Bayless Enterprises
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You accept it right from the jump that you will face trials and tribulation… If you accept it now, it will be much easier to tackle it when you walk right through it. It is all a matter of time. Be ready for these things; you can obviously not prepare and plan for every possible form of adversity… but key is to prepare for the idea of adversity.

Frequently people find ways to escape reality… That is only going to set back your progress and stifle your ability to overcome the problem at hand. I know people close to me who have their own forms of escape. They find ways to escape into a book or a video game or binge watch a tv show. Do not get me wrong, in it of itself, none of these are bad things… The problem doesn’t lie in the objects, yet their purpose… or more clearly, the motivation behind their use.

Although I will not argue that it has valid benefits other than simple entertainment, I, just like my Momma, enjoy watching tv. Now, when it comes to video games, it is all within perspective and a level of moderation. There have been many studies with evidence to suggest that video games promote a higher level of hand eye coordination; this seems to be a clear benefit; some would argue, why is that necessary… an argument for others to have… I do not choose to engage in such a topic. With books… you will never hear me express any reason to not read a book. I am a firm believer as are many other entrepreneurs and teachers that reading and learning should never stop. I mention other like-mined people in this instance not as evidence to support my claims moreover, to give credit as this is not an original idea and I appreciate giving credit where it is due. Continuing to read and educate one’s self is not a new idea…it is just something that needs to be reminded to each other as sometimes we forget.

Back on point… none of these things in themselves are harmful, some can even be beneficial within proper context and based on proper motivation.

Motivation:
What is driving to do them? Of you want to sit back and play some video games, catch a movie, watch your favorite show or just enjoy a book, these are all choice ways to enjoy some free time. I wouldn’t presume myself arrogant enough to tell you how you should enjoy your free time, but that isn’t what we are speaking on. We are talking about time that should be focused on your business. When something finds itself in your way, you need to be prepared to handle it and take it down opposed to needing a moment to escape. When you find yourself in a book, game, or tv just because you need to get away, you need to be making different choices in life or business. You shouldn’t need to escape; you need better coping skills. You need to accept that life happens, and problems arise even in business… even when you have made perfectly sound choices for your business… things happen, and things do not always go according to plan. It is okay when they don’t; you can handle it.

Escaping isn’t psychologically helpful, nor is it beneficial to the success of your business. Your business needs you. You need to be ready for you’re in for. Don’t fear the adversity; learn to thrive in it. It is going to keep coming for you; you are bigger and stronger.

Don’t hide.

a quest beyond the psyche

Posted: September 24, 2012 in Psychology
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hittin’ the mean streets
merely looking for repeats
and of course inconsistencies
for what we know based on conspiracies
and simple fallacies
searching for truth
with demeanor of utter couth
for the answer is out there
not knowing is what we can not bare
seeking light at the end of tunnel
watching things spiral out of control
as if poured through a funnel
settle not
for we get hot
towards the future tis where we look
things we seek not to be found in a book
marching to a different drum
we surely do sweat
on our persistence and determination
is where we place our bet
failure being not an option
all things known will become undone
through the knowledge we hold
the truth shall be told
each day we drudge through
the endless fight
digging clawing
with all our might
seeking what has not been sought
in a battle that has yet to be fought
get freakin’ cocky
the anthem i surely do cry
scream it loud and proud till the day i die
we know now more than we once did
and that’s where masses place their bid
we are a new generation
seeking endless information
we will not rest
for we…truly relentless
are ready for the test
brushed off
rejected
snubbed
wrongly rubbed
scowled
frowned upon
never knowing where it all went wrong
we continue in this endless parol
a quest for something new
tis what i sing in this carol
so there i stand just one boy
shouting loud…i’m fully joy

Pain at Twenty Paces

Posted: September 8, 2012 in Postulates
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In taking stock in those that are suffering from tragic circumstance due to accident or unfortunate health issues, I have begun to consider the possibilities from both angles and am presently formulating my own perspective in regards to the potential psychological conflict.

It tends to happen quite frequently that when a person is suddenly stricken with a debilitating illness or some unforeseen accident, their life changes…not just because of their new health condition, but in regards to their surroundings…more specifically, their support group. Friends and even family members begin to disappear; they suddenly have work that gets busy…family with conflicts…studying to do…homework…chores…errands…

It seems whatever it is, there is always some reasonable reason for them to not be around, and quickly it becomes a habit until they have stopped coming around at all.

From my perspective, this happens for several reasons. We as typical arrogant human beings, have the ‘Superman Complex’. People see all these terrible things in the world but believe somehow they are immune. “It could never happen to me,” they say. We all do it. Let’s be real about this. When seeing a close loved one be hit hart or effected by such a situation, people can’t take it…people shut down. They can’t face the reality that it happened so close to them without accepting the fact that it could indeed happen to them. This is a terrible situation. They definitely don’t want to step out of their own illusion and face the fact that this is a real situation and someone they hold dear is suffering, so they instead move on…they’re no longer close to this person, they no longer have to face it.

An even worse situation is when people tend to assume that with suffering comes a lack of life…these people are not yet dead. They are alive and kickin’. And some of them are kicking very hard…desperately seeking some attention…some companionship. People get it in their minds that their loved one who is suffering can’t possibly have a life…what’s left for them to think about or speak about other than what is debilitating them. This is far from the case in a grand majority of cases. And even in those cases, there is a percentage of those that could be reverted to a more joyful life and situation if they had some companionship to inspire joy…to inspire life. Frequently, when people see their loved ones in that light, they feel as though they can’t handle being around them since they have nothing left. If you were around them, they would have you. Think about it.

Sadly, the bottleneck in this continued avoidance in efforts to ease one’s own situation…one’s own comfort level…one’s own selfish state of being…they frequently succumb to their own suffering. In dealing with their own psychological discomfort of the other person’s suffering, they avoid to the point of no return…to the point at which they feel they cannot come back…to the point to which their loved has moved on and doesn’t want them to come back…to the point at which they have lost their loved one…sadly there is no turning back.

The reality is that this sort of behavior is pretty typical in our society here in America. People have this whole, “can’t someone else do it” attitude. Or they are far too consumed with themselves and what they are going through to concern themselves with what others are being plagued by. In efforts to appeal to the masses and their inherent selfishness…I am asking you to think of it from a purely selfish perspective…

Are you willing to lose this person that you so quickly have lost the time for?

Are you ready to give up all you had with them and all that the future could hold for the two of you?

Dig deep and really truly analyze these questions and yourself…because far too many have had these questions answered for them…for lack of time.

Time continues ticking…you don’t want to miss out on all the joy that could be shared if you just thought for a moment from another’s perspective.